Friday Top 5: Comedians

Stand up comedians, to be exact. Given, many stand up comedians migrate elsewhere in the realms of media-production, but they are usually at their "purest" when they are holding a mic and talking at groups of people.

If I were to include all comedians, this list would start with Stephen Colbert, but since I am not, it starts with:

1) Demetri Martin.

Demetri Martin is young. He has only been on the scene for a few years, yet he has risen to the top like a rocket. This man is a genius of the diagram, or the 1 1/2 liner.

“I saw a guy at a party wearing a leather jacket and I thought, ‘That is cool.’ But then I saw another guy wearing a leather vest and I thought, ‘That is not cool’. Then I figured it out: ‘Cool’ is all about leather sleeves.”

“Swimming is a confusing sport, because sometimes you do it for fun, and other times you do it to not die. And when I’m swimming, sometimes I’m not sure which one it is. I gotta go by the outfit. Pants - uh oh. Bathing suit - okay. Naked - we’ll see. Should I be swimming faster, or am I getting laid?”

“Some jokes are short and elegant, like a mathematical proof or a midget in a ballgown.”

2) Zach Galifianakis

The best, most understated, and mostsurprising humor that I've ever experienced. He's all about being anything but normal. Watch the comedians of comedy documentary for a good idea of his style.

"Three years ago my sister was diagnosed with multiple personalities, and there's nothing funny about that. But she phoned me the other day...and my caller ID exploded."

"Guys, have you ever woken up with an erection, and then you realize you're just in a massage chair at Brookstone...and then you yell out: I'll take it!"

3) Jim Gaffigan

Jim is probably the most "traditional" comedian on this list, but he makes it work. He has a lot of "what's the deal with..." type jokes, but they're so absurd that they work. That, plus he uses a variety of voices... you have to see it to believe it.

"How'd we come up with the robe? Was some guy just like, 'Hey, I've got an idea! Why don't we make a coat out of a towel? You can have a little belt that goes around. You could dunk the belt in the toilet! Have a toilet belt.'"

4) Eddie Izzard

A British Transvestite, Eddie doesn't normally look like the above photo. Or maybe he does, I'm not exactly sure. Eddie is a really witty guy, very smart and quick. He knows a lot about history, and makes use of that in his comedy. A lot of his jokes are veryBritish, and very silly, in the vein of Monty Python and Douglas Adams.

“But with dogs, we do have “bad dog.” Bad dog exists. “Bad dog! Bad dog! Stole a biscuit, bad dog!” The dog is saying, “Who are you to judge me? You human beings who’ve had genocide, war against people of different creeds, colors, religions, and I stole a biscuit?! Is that a crime? People of the world!” “Well, if you put it that way, I think you’ve got a point. Have another biscuit, sorry.””

5) Mitch Hedburg

The absolute king of the one-liner, Mitch's shows were long strings of single jokes with almost nothing holding them together. His comedy was good enough that he had no need for transitions. He died recently, and we lost a great comedian, before he had a chance to make his hour-long comedy special.

"I order the club sandwich all the time, but I'm not even a member, man. I don't know how I get away with it."

If you find yourself lost in the woods, fuck it, build a house. "Well, I was lost, but now I live here. I have severely improved my predicament!"

Labels: top 5

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